Whether you're looking for what to say when you call in sick, high school graduation gifts or contemplating a goodbye letter for co workers, The 5 Habits is a self-help business book designed to assist overworked, underappreciated, and frustrated employees in reducing their work responsibility, stress levels, and time in the office while inproving their corporate image, bankroll and work life balance.

After only two years of study and practice, K.P. achieved these milestones through identifying five key habits:

• Perception is Everything
• Whatever!
• The Team Player
• Procrastination
• Under the Radar

Springfield also introduces genius concepts like:

• "Diminishing ROE (Return on Effort) and Slacking Shangri-La"
• "ACTION REQUIRED - Not Really" flowchart
• The "Magical Quadrant of Successful Slacking"

If that isn’t enough, The Five Habits closes with a “Lingo Lexicon” of every hackneyed corporate term imaginable so that aspiring successful slackers can *add value* and talk the talk while walking the walk.

By the end of the book, you will be *empowered* with the skills and knowledge to shirk useless responsibility and increase your time to go spelunking, spend time with family, or anything else that makes you a more jovial and sans-stress corporate American.

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A hilarious office prank for co-workers.